Mama Norma Stories

I had the most unusual childhood home and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I grew up in an apartment, our parents both worked and lived there, Dad as the building administrator and Ma as the switchboard supervisor back when landlines were still the main source of communication. Bel-Air was built in 1938, an Art Deco masterpiece by National Artist Pablo Antonio, survived World War 2 and still stands proudly today facing Manila Bay. Two years ago, it was declared a heritage building and a national historical marker was installed on its frontage. As a heritage and historical nerd, I cried buckets of tears when I learned about it.

There are nine floors mostly residential then but now it is used as commercial spaces.

My parents knew the tenants and their families like neighbors, all 36 units. It was a loving and fun community. My parents hosted Bingo nights with the staff. Whenever I needed something, I just had to go down one floor where Dad and Ma stayed in adjacent offices. If I wanted to go and see nature, Dad would take me to Luneta Park and Manila Bay, a 15-minute walk away. If I wanted to know the latest political situation, I just had to see the protesters in front of US embassy getting tear gas or being hosed down by police or check out rallies in Quirino Grandstand. If we craved for halo-halo, Mama would order at the back kitchen of Chowking because she’s friendly with the manager and got extra servings.

We stayed there for more than 25 years up until Dad had to retire, I stayed there for half of my life and that is why I still love buildings more than stand-alone houses.

There used to be tigers in the building garage. Yes, not in the zoo but small cages which housed two large tigers and small ones owned by Daktari, a tenant in the building. He made the place a tourist attraction where guests could go inside the cage and have their photos taken with the big cats. My siblings were able to go but Dad wouldn’t let me since I was just seven that time and so I would just peep into holes so I could see them.

For tenants who couldn’t pay their rent anymore, the rule was they need to leave their stuff behind. The owner gave Dad the liberty to dispose or take some of these items at his discretion. So we had mixed and matched furniture, appliances and home decorations. Our ref was a 1960’s Frigidaire US model, Asian wooden bookends, ceramic elephants from Thailand, a vinyl turntable, old film projector and other fascinating collectibles. My favorite stuff were books of course. At 11, I was reading grown-up books because some tenant had a collection of war related materials. Dad acquired VHS tapes featuring a James Bond filmography.

I remembered my final day in Bel-Air. It was Christmas Day. I felt the walls comforting me. It will be fine. You will be fine. Through the years, I kept coming back especially when Dad was around or when I worked near it. I passed by it everyday on my walk to the office and seeing it made me think of Mama.

They say home is where the heart is and part of mine will always live in this happy place.

Mama used to be the ultimate party organizer. She made every excuse to gather people together. Birthday, anniversary, graduation, basketball championship, novena, reunion – anything worth celebrating, she’s in. Our home wasn’t big enough to accommodate lots of people but somehow, they seem to fit. Ma and Daddy used to have bingo sessions with their workmates in the building, they would sit on sleeping mats while having a beer and appetizers.

Ma’s favorite dishes to prepare included basic staples: pancit bihon, lumpiang shanghai, fried chicken, chicken macaroni, menudo, ginataang bilo-bilo and pineapple juice on a cocktail bowl. She would let me chop the vegetables and be a taster, my favorite role. Ma loved fruits in season, there’s always banana, mandarin and mangoes.

Mama would prepare early in the morning, going to Paco market to buy ingredients. She mastered the art of haggling. First, she would haggle and if the seller won’t give in to her asking price, she would try to ever slowly walk away, just in time for the person to call her back and surrender. Triumphant in this quest, she would buy me salted peanuts at the end of our wet market errand.

I always remembered how Ma cooked a simple dish even when times were hard and bought a simple Goldilocks cake roll to put a candle on and make a wish. Our home was filled with laughter, music and lively chatter. She loved to serve and feed people. It was her love language, acts of service. It was such a shock to me that she knew how to play the piano when she performed in Tito Pon’s house a few months before she passed away. Ma also entertained people through her song and dance numbers. Whenever one of us in the family hear You Needed Me by Anne Murray, we can’t help but shed a few tears because it’s her theme song.  It’s her way of saying she’s still with us, singing and dancing to Shalala Lala. Moon river is another favorite videoke song of hers.

A celebration didn’t need to be fancy or expensive for her. It just had to be shared with the warmth of the community and made you feel seen, valued and loved.  Cheers Ma!

Ma’s journal entry for Teret’s birthday

Mama Norma (4th from left) with her Tupperware pitcher

Mama Norma in blue with family and relatives

Mama Norma in brown, goofing around

Ely and Norma worked as telephone operators and 0.8 km away from each other’s workplace when the stars aligned for them. They met through a common friend, Dad’s former girlfriend to be exact, who introduced them. Soon they became phone pals and the rest is party line history.

Our father developed tuberculosis during his late 20’s and was often in the hospital. He overheard one nurse asked Mama, “Why do you keep on visiting him? Find another one, you’re just wasting your time because he will die soon.” Mama stood by his side, brought him food, didn’t mind if he was contagious and helped him recuperate until he got stronger. Love in the time of TB.  A scarred lung is no match for beating hearts.

Ely (4th from left) and Norma (5th from left)

Ely and Norma in Bel-Air – their home and office for four decades

During the 1960’s when young women were mostly full-time homemakers, Mama took up a secretarial course and became the family’s breadwinner. She had to take care of her mother Celing and aunt Tess after a sad separation from her father. This resilience amidst life’s challenges is one of her most admirable character traits. She always bounced back and faced another day.

One of her favorite tales was on her way to a job interview, the heel of her shoes split open and she had to walk barefoot just to make it on time. She got that role. Mama was quite good because she received endorsements from former employers as she transitioned from one job to another.

Her work involved being a telephone operator, secretary and a typist. As someone who loved talking to people, this role fits her perfectly. Her speaking voice has a certain cadence, not too low or high-pitched. It is soothing to the ears. In an era of mobile phones, a switchboard is a museum piece. This is a machine which the telephone operator or cable girl used to literally attach wires to enable both caller and receiver to engage in conversation. Google it.

Since Ma’s workplace was also situated in our house, I’d like to think that our parents were the pioneers of WHF set-up. My favorite childhood memory was going down one floor to her work area aka the switchboard booth and plopped beside the huge machine while reading a book. She would greet all tenants and guests since her area was near the elevator. She knew them by heart. All nine floor building residents, their families and frequent visitors.

This was her work for more than 30 years. The switchboard was also the reason how Dad met our mother. Thank you, God. Kudos to you too Alexander Graham Bell.

Our mother’s life unfolded like a telenovela story, with plot twists, struggles and redemption. The writing is not going to be in chronological order because it’s a work in progress. I will focus more on stories about her, some I witnessed, some from my father and siblings, some passed on to me by those whose lives she touched in some significant way.

Norma grew up in the northern part of the country by the beach surrounded by her family and cousins from both sides of her parents. She was outgoing, the life of the party and she loved entertaining people. Mama knew how to sing, dance and play instruments. She celebrated life loud.

From left: Cecilia (mother), siblings Feliciano, Rogelio, Norma, Romeo and Pedro (father)

A teenager

This blog celebrates the life of our dear Mama Norma who passed away at age 61 due to aneurysm. Surrounded by her family, she opened her eyes one last time from coma as we sang her favorite songs – Sacred Heart of Jesus and Immaculate Mother before coming home to God.

Through this digital archive of stories, her grandchildren and the succeeding generations of our family will be able to know her and remember her legacy.